Lindsey Bell is a non-fiction author, stay-at-home mother to two wonderful little boys, wife, and blogger. You can find Lindsey online at her main blog: www.lindsey-bell.com and her miscarriage blog: www.livingwholeagain.blogspot.com.
I grew up watching fairy tales. Stories like Cinderella and Snow White and Beauty and The Beast. Each story was different, but they all ended the same: “And they lived happily ever after.” The men and women in these stories never fought over whose turn it was to get up with baby or who forgot to take out the trash.
Blame it on Hollywood or romantic books or even innocent fairy tales like these, but for whatever reason, we assume that nothing but marital bliss follows the wedding day. “And they lived happily ever after” is a phrase we expect to prove true in our lives. We expect the sex to be passionate. We expect the fights to be few and far between. And we expect the romance to continue long after we say, “I do.”
The reality is this: marriage is hard work. Good marriages don’t just happen. They result from two people being intentional—two people who have committed their lives to building the other person up.
Today, I want to offer you five simple ways to build up your spouse.
1. Tell him you’re proud of him. Men long for their wives to respect them. They want to know we’re proud of them—proud of the work they do and proud of the men they are. This one is easy. We can all do it today.
2. Make a list of everything you love about him. Give the list to him before you go to bed for the night.
3. Pray for him (and then tell him you did).
4. Do something special for him. Give him the night off (no chores, no daddy duties, etc.). Buy him a favorite candy bar. Make his favorite dinner or dessert. Allow him to choose a movie for date night. Be creative, and have fun with this.
5. Plan for intimacy. I know some women don’t like to do this. They assume planning takes the passion out of it. Though I certainly understand this complaint, I prefer to think of it this way: I plan for things that are important to me. Doctor appointments are important, so I plan for them. So are school meetings, so I plan for these as well. Your marriage is certainly important enough to plan for.
What simple things do you do to build up your spouse? I’d love to hear your ideas.
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