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Leading Your Family Like Jesus

I have to admit I care much too much about what others think. About what YOU think. Even when I sit down to write an uplifting blog that will point others to Jesus, I'm also concerned that people will be pleased.

One of the best things that happened to me was co-writing a book with two guys who are older than my dad. Ken Blanchard is a New York Times best-selling author. Phil Hodges worked in the corporate world most of his life and is co-founder with Ken of Lead Like Jesus Ministries. They've been loving God, serving people, and leading others for many years.

As I helped compile their stories into our book, Lead Like Jesus, they spoke with confidence and shared examples from the foundation of God's Word. They've experienced life and have messed up enough to know they need to depend on God for everything. Working with them reminded me that no one is perfect, but we each have something to give and share. Working with them I was reminded I was a leader and that my ordinary days—even the daily, busy, craziness of life—were where my children would be schooled in following God.

Here's an excerpt in our book, Lead Your Family Like Jesus, about that very thing:

The One Who Matters

"True worship requires that my eyes are on God, not on others. He is the audience of One that I live my life for.

Jesus was scathing in His judgment of the scribes and Pharisees, whom He called hypocrites because they did their good deeds to be seen by men:

Everything they do is done for men to see … they love the place of honor at banquets and the most important seats in the synagogues; they love to be greeted in the marketplaces and to have men call them “Rabbi.”

(Matthew 23:5-7)

I hate to think of all the “good” things I’ve done for the same reason. And the truth is, God knew the truth! He knew when I did things—like help in the church kitchen—because I wanted to look good. Or when I didn’t do things—like inviting [new friends] Skyler and Tara over for dinner—because I didn’t want to look bad in comparison. He knew when I was focused horizontally on others instead of turning my heart vertically toward God.

Two problems result from thinking horizontally. The first is that others’ opinions, not God’s, become the source of our security and self-worth. The second is that our kids pick up on it. My children have seen firsthand how I’ve run around cleaning the house for company. They’ve seen me buy a new outfit for a meeting or, worse, when I’ve tried to mold them into something they’re not—in order to make me look good.

Too many of us tell our children, “Don’t worry about what the other kids think,” then trade in our car for a nicer one with payments we can’t really afford. Since our kids follow what we do, we shouldn’t be surprised when they succumb to peer pressure.

We don’t have to let things continue down this path. Instead of making decisions because of peer pressure—or in order to look good—we need to have our kids join us in loving and serving others “as if you were serving the Lord, not men” (Ephesians 6:7). Worship isn’t just about singing praises on Sundays; it’s about living lives that glorify God every day of the week."

Do you struggle with horizontally—instead of vertical thinking—do you?

How do you lead your kids into serving unto the Lord, not men?


Tricia Goyer,

Tricia talks about Showing Servant Leadership:

Free pdf: attached

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