All tagged parenthood

The Best (and Most Resisted) Words a Mama Can Say: "Help. I don't know what I'm doing."

Death can provide an exclamation point on a life that was already expressing the glory of God. 

My friend passed between that one-day-will-be-thin sheath of death and life and I tried to remember if I'd ever told her how much of an imprint she'd left upon me.

Claire and I shared a small city but couldn't have been more different, back then. She had six children. I had none. My womb was empty -- and sometimes I wore a suit to work. I was fumbling through my twenties, both unsure of myself and also overconfident and she had bigger concerns than her weekend plans. She'd earned her grey hair.

The Fantasy of Rest

It's a radiant four pm. The counters are wiped, slick. The sink is empty and dinner is simmering next to my teapot, also humming. The children are willingly lost in the woods out back and the babe still asleep. I can't smell anyone's afternoon sweat and there's not a disparate sock in sight. The only smell in my house, aside from dinner, is the new candle I lit to memorialize afternoons like this one. 

I sink into my chair, alone, with a book and my Bible and I'm ready to receive all that the next full hour of rest has for me.

This is you, too, right? "Once every three and a half months," you answer, if you're like me.

Except in my mind's eye.

If there is room for fantasy for a mother of five who moonlights as a writer, this would be my daily fantasy. Life ordered and quiet -- so that I can actually rest.