Dear Mom {who is trying to do it all}

Dear Mom Who is Trying to Do it All

For the past week, my two youngest children have been sick… really sick. After a trip to urgent care, I settled in for what would prove to be a long and exhausting week with my two little “patients.”

It had been a long time since our kids had been this sick – and a long time since I had been that tired. The youngest of my four children is five years old. With a good stretch of health in the family, I was finally feeling like a normal human being again – that is until this past week (it is amazing what a good night of sleep can do!).

This past week was a reminder though of how I felt for a span of about ten years. For much of those ten years I was pregnant, giving birth, rocking babies, breastfeeding, and chasing toddlers. As I think back to that special (but exhausting) time in my life, I feel compelled to pass something on to you.

To you, the mom who feels trapped in those crazy, exhausting, and seemingly endless moments right now. 

I need to tell you something that is so, so, important. It is something I wish someone would of told me.

You can’t do it all. You just can’t.

We live in a culture that is telling us that we can. Not only is our culture saying we can do it all, it is saying that we MUST do it all. The lie that so many of us can fall into believing is that our worth and significance come from what we do. Some of you may even believe that your worth comes from being a mom and doing motherhood perfectly.  But that isn’t what God tells us.

God tells us that we are fearfully and wonderfully made, beautiful in His sight, and a treasured possession in Christ.  Our significance comes from being His child. His daughter. His girl. Period.

It’s not from what we do, whether that be an executive, teacher, doctor, or mom. Our worth is found in Christ alone. We don’t have to earn it or work for His approval. Who we are is defined by what Jesus has done for us – so we rest in knowing and being known by Him.

There is great freedom and joy when we live out of this truth. But it doesn’t come easy. We can too quickly forget and so we need to regularly remind ourselves of who we are in God’s eyes. We will be talking about balance throughout this month. I think a good place to start is laying aside the “rat race” you may find yourself caught in and resting in Him.

Now I am all for a good race and know that we are called to run with perseverance….

but I also know that our running will be in vain if we don’t first take time to rest in the God whose love defines us. 

Do you feel trapped in the “rat race”? Are you resting or are you worrying? As we start this series I would love to pray for you. How can I pray for you? Please…share your requests below and lets gather together lifting one another up in prayer.

Blessings,

Ruth Schwenk

This post is part of our series Finding Balance as a Busy Mom. 

Please check the series page for all of the posts! 

Finding Balance as a Busy Mom

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Comments

  1. Su says

    Yes, I worry and do not rest. I feel like such a bad mom most days Yes, I feel like I should be able to do it all but really, really can’t. I’m lonely….very, very lonely. Please pray for my family, my marriage, and for me. I appreciate the help and prayers. Thank you for your prayers and for doing this series of posts.

  2. says

    I personally believe, as mothers, we feel trapped in this ‘rat race’ because we have taken our eyes off God and as place them on men.

    We want to do everything ‘right and perfect’ to please our overwhelming mothers who constantly reminds us that she did not do it that way when you were a child. We focus on our seemingly perfect friend who seem to have it all together, but is really living in her own shame and insecurities.

    I have a confession to make, I too am that mother, but daily I pray for wisdom to do His will and not men’s . And slowing I am getting there. I am looking forward to this series Ruth. I am sure it will be a blessing to all who reads it.

    “but as for me andmy house, we will serve the Lord” Joshua 24:15.

    Peace to all.

  3. mommypenny says

    I am of a mom of 4 grown children and have recently had to take over the care of 2 of my grand kids. One is a year and a half and the other is three….I am beyond tired and stressed. Never really thought about having to raise babies again after I was done raising my own! Prayers Please for patience,compassion,understanding….

  4. p heitman says

    I am going thru a tough season in my life. I feel very exhausted and sometimes at the very end of my rope. I have three beautiful children whom I absolutely adore. They are wonderful kids, and although things are very busy they are the sunshine to my day. The things I am going thru (I don’t want to get into specific detail) don’t pertain to the children. I just need prayer to help ease the boulder sitting in the bottom of my stomach right now. I need prayer for strength to get thru the next few days/weeks. If anyone feels compelled to pray for me, I would be ever so grateful.

    • C says

      I will pray for you and hope whatever obstacles or challenges you are facing you are able to draw strength to make it through the day/s.

  5. JAKfromCO says

    I am constantly running the race, worrying, working, worrying, and running to keep up. I am not happy and I never rest. I don’t feel like I can rest. I don’t feel like I can give 100% to my kids or my husband or my job or myself. I am tired and I am so lonely. I am actively trying to make some necessary changes in our family life, but I’m being met with resistance and sadness from my children and husband. Please pray for God’s direction for my family to be fully revealed and that we would find peace in His direction. Please pray that my marriage and family unit will be blessed and remain strong throughout this transition. I am excited to follow this series and I hope to find balance. Thank you.

  6. Nicole Padilla Darcy says

    I tend to feel overwhelmed and I just give up, and I do the bare minimum. I know that I can do so much better if I prioritize and don’t worry about the stuff that doesn’t NEED to be done.

  7. Corrine says

    I am a 27 year old mother of 5. My two step sons ages 10 and 5 are not with us constantly but every weekend. My daughter is 4 years old and then I have boy girl twins that are 11 months old. I constantly feel the pressure to be a perfect mother, to keep the house clean when my husband gets home and to make sure everything in the home is taken care of. On top of that I am finishing my last term of college to earn my Associates degree. I have asked for help before and always felt like a burden and now I am learning to ask more and without fear of what others might say. Most times others are eager to help. I just wish I gave myself some more time to relax. My husband injured his back following a surgery so it looks like this degree I’m earning will come in handy in the fall for me to work instead of him. I pray he is okay and that we financially and emotionally make it through this next year. Please pray for me and my family and I will continue to remind myself just how blessed I am and won’t forget to ask for help. Thank you.

  8. Kaytee says

    To be perfectly honest, I never have the courage to write comments in this type of thing. Actually, it isn’t courage that I am having problem with, it is the acceptance of having a problem. I feel that my problems are usually small, not major enough that I need a prayer and it doesn’t deserve any attention. I feel selfish to even ask. I am in a fine boat, being sure to keep my eyes on the right place; Jesus.

    But okay, I know I am not perfect. Never have, not now nor ever will I be perfect.

    I broke the lease knowingly that having dogs was not allowed. It wasn’t too hard to accept that fact knowing eventually I will be caught and getting in trouble. What makes it hard is when the landlord tells me so, I have to find my dogs a new home. I have no faith in finding another family. I doubt big time there will be anyone wanting my dogs. Of course after my landlord left, I spend rest of the day crying because I have to give up my dogs. I grew to love them. I want to keep them. But my apartment was not big enough, and it is not right place for them.
    I panic, I worried and I fret. I screamed and cried, yelled and cussed. Threatened my boyfriend and myself.
    Of course that got me nowhere. I knew subconsciously to pray, to surrender to God. I knew to give it up to Him and let Him handle it. But I made the mistake, I was in the wrong and I put myself in that place, so I should fix my own errors. Not God, nor anyone else, especially not the new families to take my dogs. Nobody should have to fix my mistake but myself.

  9. Novella says

    At this point in my life I’m worrying, trying to do it all & keep it all together
    And ended up in the ER with anxiety & my pressure sky high. I’m weary & in need of lifting up in prayer

    • thebettermom says

      Oh Novella…praying that God would give you HIS peace. We can trust in God for every single thing we need and I pray you would rest in that promise.

  10. Sarah says

    I am at a point in life I NEVER imagined I would be, would have laughed at anyone who told me this would happen to me…but here I am, trying to make it through. My husband left the kids and I for someone else and I am now trying to raise our three young kids by myself. I have been a stay at home mom since my oldest was born and have recently had to start working full time to make ends meet. This has been a huge adjustment for my children and me. At the end of the day, I just feel exhausted, wondering how I am going to keep this up. I was one of those moms who had to do it all and now I have been forced to say no to so many things. I want to be the kind of mom my kids deserve but I’m not sure how to juggle all that’s on my plate. If you could pray for my family, I would greatly appreciate it!

    • Dana says

      I pray for strength for Sarah and her children as they try to navigate their new reality in the face on divorce. Please, Lord, lift her up to be the mother and father for her children, that she may set an example of faithfulness in Christ during this trial.
      Sarah, many {hugs} to you. You are so much stronger than you realize <3

      • Sarah says

        Thank you Dana! You have no idea how much your words touched me…my eyes are blurry with tears as I write this. Bless you!

  11. Indymom says

    I feel like I am failing as a mother. I have to work (I am the primary breadwinner) and my job requires me to be available 24/7. My personality is pretty conservative–I try to be silly and have fun with our son but its my husband who is the “fun” one. Add to everything, I just found out that I am going through very early menopause. It took us years of treatment to have our son and there was always that “hope” that maybe I would get pregnant again. That is being taken from me and I am grieving. Please pray for me.

    • says

      Oh Indymom, I am more conservative too. My husband is much more fun than I am. I’m so sorry about the news that you’re going through menopause. You’re not failing, you are doing the best you can. God doesn’t expect perfection.

  12. Bri4021 says

    I am a single mother of three. Ages 9, 2, and 1. I am constantly running the race. Some days are better than others. I am frustrated that I do this alone. I feel alone. I just pray for strength, balance, and peace…I pray for anything that will make me happy again.

    • thebettermom says

      Oh Bri4021 praying for God’s strength as you raise your children as a single mom. Praying for God’s peace and joy to fill your heart again and the courage to see the blessing in the midst of your pain.

  13. Benita says

    I am a mother of 7 with the oldest being 11. I had bad habits before having kids (like being messy) and they have learned from me. I constantly feel like I am trying to catch up or keep the ship from sinking and I can’t get it together and mess up more than I succeed. I feel so scared. I try to hide and cover up and it’s so hard to imagine getting ahead. I am exhausted. Also they have been sick all winter and I’ve hardly gotten out. Thank you for your prayers!

  14. Jen says

    God bless, you Ruth. I soo needed this. I just posted this morning on Facebook that I don’t understand how I can run from 4:30am until ten at night with nothing visible accomplished. I am a SAHM of four ages 5-12 who has recently taken on a 5-6 hour per week job in our church and am working at two correspondence courses that I am far behind in. In the pas three weeks, our kids and my husband have been ill, one of them twice, and our oldest receives stitches after a household accident. I have been up nights emptying barf buckets, fetching inhalers and cold cloths and Tylenol, feeling foreheads and taking pulses, and sitting in the ER, trying to sooth my frantic screaming son as they froze and stitched his toenail back on. My husband is spent too and has been grumbling about where I am falling short keeping up with dishes and laundry and housekeeping. I see other women hold down a full time job pull everything off and I can’t even do it without the full time job and I hear a voice whisper to me, something is wrong with you, you are incompetent, you have failed. I struggle with this on an ongoing basis, and I thank you for this post and this series.

    • Friend says

      You need rest and I am praying that the season will arrive soon. A SAHM of 4 is more busy than any woman working full time. Your mind is on over-drive constantly. Do not let Satan fill your mind with doubt. Tell yourself the truth about how special you are. You need to communicate to your husband that his negativity is not helping and if needed get counseling to communicate your feelings. Seek ways to get help with the housework. You could start with your church’s youth or college group. Also, consider talking to your doctor about your emotions. I know so many women who are suffering from depression and anxiety. There is help in the form of medication and counseling. God has given us so many ways to cope. Please seek out the one that is best for you!

  15. says

    I think every mother at some point feels she is running the rat race. The rat race, i can handle; or so I think! Lol. I think my battle is dealing with my bonus children’s bio mom. At least right now, that seems to be my biggest battle. I take on a lot. Some times knowingly, and other times not so knowingly. Lol I’m a team mom for my girls softball team. A side lines cheerer for my 6 year old and a teacher to my 1-1/2 year old. I also work a full time job. Hubby was laid off. and bills are starting to get heavy. Even with all this on my plate, the one thing I need prayer on, is the ex. She is starting to put a burden on the children. When she is present, they struggle with who to listen to or who to sit with. I happily tell them to go with their mother, and never take offense when they do. But its to the point now they can’t even play with their brother without her demanding them to sit by her, or demanding them to “get over here”. Even the ex’s mother is contibuting to this sad behavior. At practices or games if I tell my daughter something, I see it in her eyes, the struggle on who to listen to or who not to listen too. It hurts me. and it’s never something I don’t tell the rest of the team or my older daughter, its the simple things too. I am extreamly careful to be fair and unbaised. So please. If every Better Mom could possibly pray for this woman, then maybe the burden of bitterness will be lifted from her. And our families can thrive in a peaceful nature. *sigh* I think the rest will work itself out.

  16. Andrea says

    I NEVER feel good enough, that I do ENOUGH for my kids, that I give them enough or that I provide enough for them. EVER. I do what I can. I give them what we can but I have so much guilt that they don’t have THE BEST of everything. Please pray that I can have peace knowing that we do what we can and we LOVE them more than anything else. I want them to grow up knowing that love ruled our house and that they we’re always first. Although I try to do it all, I know I can’t, but that never keeps me from trying!

  17. Christin says

    This may sound crazy to all these amazing women that have 3 or more kids, I only have 1. One precious little 7 month old. And I have never in my life felt more inadequate. Not when I was a teenager and my mom was bein hurtful, not through either of my divorces, when 1 husband said I wasn’t worth his time, or when the 2nd husband put his hands on me. Not even then. Now? Now I’m trying to balance working enough to take care of him and our family, and being home enough to take care of him, and finding a reliable safe babysitter, and keeping my relationship with his dad safe. On top of everything, I’m having surgery on my heart. I have known that this surgery was eventually going to happen, and have known for years, but when I got that phone call a few weeks ago that it was time to start allot he pre-open stuff? Ugh, it just Callopsed me. It destroyed what little resolve I had left. Does everyone feel like they just aren’t good enough, aren’t strong or smart enough, to be what their children need them to be? Or am I just some crazy lady that’s being too hard on myself? I feel like he deserves the best possible, and I can’t possibly seem to give him that.

  18. Bethany says

    I am a Mom of a 5,4,3year old and just had our fourth child 4 weeks ago… I homeschool and today really felt like I totally was wiped out and totally drained… I have been extremely irritable with my kids and I feel horrible…. I am trying to be their Mom, my husbands wife, a home maker, cook, teacher, etc and feel like I am failing half of the time… I know most of this is pressure I put on myself. I have been feeling such a disconnect with God as I have not done devotions in a long time. I am too exhausted to do it through out the day and then I try to read at night and can’t concentrate on the verses bc I am so tired… please pray for me…

  19. mommyknight says

    I am a mother of a two year old and a one year old and we just found out I am pregnant again. I am exhausted, I am sick 80% of the time and my husband works so much he is never home. I feel like a single parent. I feel like a horrible mother and wife. I have babies, a house and husband to tend to. And in the midst of my own personal issues I feel like I just can’t do it all. I feel like I am neglecting my babies if I rest or if I do housework yet I don’t feel like doing any of these things I just want to go to bed. It has been the hardest year of my life, and it is about to get harder. I have so much to be happy about and be grateful for yet I can’t find either anymore.

    • Friend says

      God bless you :) I want to encourage you to seek out some help with your housework and watching the kids while you rest or even just go on a walk, There must be some youth or college students who attend your church that would be willing to help for free or very little. I do not think people realize how much help young mothers need. In return for their help, you can mentor them (i.e. older women mentor younger ones), by sharing wisdom on marriage, children, cooking, and cleaning. I pray that you find some rest soon.

    • em says

      I have been there, only three years ago. I’m praying for you right now. Do you have a friend who could come over and help you for a couple hours?

  20. a mom says

    I am dealing with a disappointment within my marraige that is impacting my 4 children and myself. Financial pressures and balancing work with home life. I have also been sick for several weeks and just can’t seem to shake it. I need God’s healing in every area of my life.

  21. nursetomany says

    Im definitely running the race…a nurse that works 50 hour weeks…hardly able to sit down at work….to get off of work and run errands and hurry home and take care of my husband and our 5 kids….its overwhelming trying to keep up and be a good mom….I cant be home with them when they r sick due to shortstaffed schedules…..thankfully my husband can as he is disabled due to a mental condition…..but burnout and feeling overneeded is overwhelming me….but im so thankful to my amazing God for providing me this job that pays our bills that I love and an amazing husband, kids and church family….im just in need of an attitude adjustment I believe. …

  22. vicki says

    My husband felt call from god to leave his ministry position in December 2013, we are still waiting to hear gods voice on our next adventure. We have applied for so many positions and haven’t got them or they havwnt rung back. The only one that has actually contacted us is in the middle of nowhere, away from our support systems, family and friends. Its a 3 day drive to anywhere, yes that remote. So as we sit here telling our kids money is tight, budgeting to every last penny and watching pur bank balance go down with not much going in, we are trying to remember this is all gods plan, all his work. Trying to praise him in difficult times.
    Thanks vicki

  23. Sad SAHM says

    I am struggling with guilt…I begged and begged to be a SAHM since my now 5 year old came into our family. (both of my boys are adopted) He was the sweetest, most easy going baby and I felt that I missed everything. Well, I finally got the opportunity to stay home with my 15 month old and 5 year old (he’s in preschool too). It is not all that I thought it would be…I feel like a failure or I am doing something wrong. I get so angry and then I feel more guilty. I often wish I wasn’t at home…yet this is what I wanted…my husband sees how unhappy and overwhelmed I am and he tells me to find a daycare for a few mornings a week. He is trying to be supportive and yet I just feel even worse. A SAHM who takes her child to daycare. :( It would be different if he was ready for preschool.

    • valerie says

      There should be no guilt … view it as a time for yourself and bonus for your child. The child will get to see/learn/and meet new kids. You are just renewing yourself during those few hours.

  24. lacie says

    Thank you for this. Because, 3 years ago I lost my baby boy, since then being a full time mom to my stepson and the baby who made it, my 2-year-old daughter, I’ve done it all while grieving. Actually, I haven’t done it all, I can’t, I’m carrying as much guilt as grief. I want to do more, be better, and quit weighing down my children with my sadness.

  25. patti says

    I look forward to following this series. As a wife of 27 years, mother of a 17 YO son, a self-employed individual who is seeing a downturn in her profession plus the caretaker of a 84 YO aging memory-challenged mother I am often stressed and tried by the trials of everyday life. I try to find joy in the small blessings placed in my path every day and look forward to reading your insights and messages. Thank you!

  26. Justina Desjardins says

    Hello. I feel overwhelmed with making everyone content. Every day I think of what it would feel like to read every minute during the day with my nose in the bible. I get upset when I am unable to have this time to praise the Lord, to get to know him and to really be grateful for my days. I love my 2 children, I love my husband very much but sometimes I get so frustrated and resentful due to my lack of time with the word and talking to God. The chores, my hubby working 2 jobs, the struggle. I want more time with of course the whole family but really yearn for time with Jesus. I hope I am making sense. One moment I wish I could be home schooling my kids and the next I can’t imagine that chaos. I feel I am giving more of my time and energy to of course the little ones and my hubby when he is home but the left overs to God. I don’t like that. I am and often pray for clarity, his will, to use me, to challenge me and teach me. I pray for patience, wisdom and love. *Sigh!

  27. valerie says

    I am mom with 4 girls ages 9,7,5,& 1. I work full time …or extra full time about 60hrs a week. My kids make my day everyday. With all the mom duties we all have I find myself taking my 1 yr old to the sitter a few hours on my day off to just renew myself. My husband struggles to understand why ….. but I have found peace knowing that I am better Mom & feel better about myself for doing it. All mom’s need a break and someone to pray for them:)

  28. Christin Henry says

    I don’t understand how when I finally have a great husband, and an amazing child that I have wanted for years, that now is the time that I am the most worried and stressed. I just feel so inadequate. I’ve never felt like this before. Our finances are so terrible, so I try and pick up more shifts and I can’t because I can’t afford daycare on an extra day. Then I feel guilty because I can’t seem to juggle work, baby, marriage, and housework. So to top it all off my cardiologist called a few weeks ago and told me to start doing a bunch of pre-open stuff because it’s time for surgery. I just felt like I Callopsed inside. What little resolve I had was just gone. I just don’t feel like I’m good enough of a mom, or wife, or employee, or homemaker, or anything.

  29. Tyne Hayflinger says

    I am a mom of a seven year old beautiful little girl. Last summer she was diagnosed w autism and my twenty year marriage ended. I’m left w selling the house and I’ve been trying to find for the past two years. I’m divorced now. I’m working hard at single parenting my daughter. I found two jobs finally, but they are in a different state. I need prayers to go and take my daughter, start over, in a fresh healthy area where she can finally start to get services. Prayer that my ex finally just let us go and stop controlling us.

  30. mel says

    I am a Sahm of 5 kids aged 16-7 with a husband who works out of the country so I’m alone alot. My 15 yr old son has always been very emotional and gets upset easy and the past year it has gotten so much worse. He is depressed, even to the point of talking about suicide. He feels everyone is always against him. Today I took him for a haircut and they cut it shorter than he wanted and he flipped out in the car, screaming at me and crying. He punched the dash and said I ruin his life. I just don’t know what to do to help this boy! I lay awake many nights, worried about him. He cannot handle being teased at all and turns small things into huge things. I know how hard life is and I know how many disappointments and problems he will face in his life and he makes his life so much harder than it has to be by being so upset and angry all the time. It’s affecting my other kids too, not knowing what will set him off. I’d appreciate prayers for my son…And all my kids. And prayers for my husband and myself to grow stronger and for our faith to be increased. It’s so hard sometime.

    • Wendy Del Monte says

      Mel- I had a very depressed daughter. I know how terrifying and isolating it is. I’d love to pray with you .

  31. kelly says

    I really needed to read that! Thank you!
    I have two little ones. My youngest is 2 1/2 and has never been a good sleeper. I have been sleep deprived pretty much this whole time.
    The last two weeks have been extra hard. Last week my 7 year old son got sick and was up a lot at night. This week it’s my daughters turn. She’s literally been by my side 24 hours a day. I’m overwhelmed and depressed at how little me time I get and how exhausted i an every day.
    I want to ge a rested mama so i can give my best to the Lord, my husband and my kids. No one is getting my best right now :(

  32. Rachel Fama says

    I like that you are doing a series in being balanced. I often feel like I need to either focus on my family or on the house. It feels like it’s one or the other…..it’s hard to do both WELL at the same time! I’ve just gotten some tremendous tools to help me get more done, but I can feel myself slipping back into the same patterns of non-productivity and frustration, and I’m beginning to get a sinking feeling. Please pray that I will keep moving in the right direction, that God will strengthen me to make significant and lasting changes, by His grace. Thank you for bringing the burdens of each of us to the throne of our Father!

  33. Sorting It All Out Still says

    I am 51, have just one out of the four sons still at home, but I still needed to hear this in a huge way today! I took on caregiving for my 79 year old mother almost two years ago, and nurturing her, at my age, feels more difficult than homeschooling all four sons at one point! Taking care of a parent has attached to it even MORE expectations on everyone’s parts, and just like with the kids, I still can’t do it all. I know I need to start telling myself that more and maybe even write a big fat note for myself to read daily and post it on the refrigerator :0 )

  34. Dr.mom1583 says

    I can’t believe how many women are saying the same things…sounds like we’re all at the point of sheer exhaustion and yet we are able to carry on. The thing I try to remind myself regularly is God will never give me more than I can handle…though it may seem like it at times.

    I too am exhausted and feeling empty and alone. Lately I’ve been trying to find my purpose. There seems to be so much pain and suffering in this world and I know I can help but idk how. I believe that my children are not my only children and that often gets me to overextended myself. I am praying for those of you also struggling right now. Please pray that I can learn who I am and what my true purpose is. Thank you!

  35. M&M says

    I am definitely worrying! I never dreamt life would be this difficult at this time in my life. My husband and I are going on four years of marriage and I am not proud of what we have faced in that short time of marriage. We expected to get married, move to where his job is and start our own life and family together. It’s supposed to be the happiest time of our lives right??!
    On almost exactly our one year wedding anniversary we found out I was pregnant. We felt so blessed that I became pregnant so easy and life seemed so perfect in that moment!
    Then at about 20 weeks I developed severe carpal tunnel and joint swelling. When I finally started feeling a little better from that, 24 weeks hit and I became extremely sick and dizzy with severe migraines, hot flashes…the list goes on. From then on it got worse….every single day I dealt with more and more symptoms. I have never been so sacred for me and my baby…our family!!! I thought there was seriously something wrong with me….it was so debilitating my mom Had to move in. With no answers from drs… I got thru with the help of family and prayers and delivered a healthy baby girl, BUT my daughter is now 2 and I still don’t feel well with no answers of why I feel so sick. Makes me feel like such a horrible mother and wife because I can’t be independent and take care of my daughter by myself all the time. I have to rely on everyone else to help me. I am so thankful I have family that will drive two hours to help, but I feel like I’ve failed my husband and my daughter because of my health that gets in the way of enjoying my family! My family just need prayers, strength and peace to get through these trials! Thank you so much!

    • amber1979 says

      Praying for you. I’m a mama of three little ones who has progressively got sicker and sicker through my pregnancies and beyond with them. You will be in my prayers as I know the longings of a mother’s heart to be able to do more and how hard it is to have to have help when you’re long to be able to do it myself. I lived with the Mistry of my illness for nine years until last year I was diagnosed with Lyme disease and now have been getting treatment which is been helping give me some mobility back. I encourage you to look into the possibility of Lyme disease being what is causing your illness. Many of the symptoms you shared our classic
      Symptoms and it often comes on during pregnancy. Look for a local doctor who understands this disease as many do not

      • M&M says

        Oh my goodness I’m so sorry, boy do I feel for you soooo much! Thank you for responding with your story! I have only been tested maybe once or twice from a family dr thru blood work for Lyme and came back normal like all my other labs….but I still feel so sick! How did they find your Lyme? Thru blood? I’m so glad they found it tho so you have treatment now. Tht was the other thing I’m so scared and think that having more kids is not even in the question because I’m already so sick!
        I’m so grateful you responded now I can figure out the next step to find a diagnosis! And it definitely feels like fibro too. I’m praying for you

    • amber1979 says

      I encourage you to look for a local doctor who is familiar with lime disease and get tested. It is a very misunderstood disease and most doctors and even rheumatologists do not understand it and will not diagnose. I was told that I had fibromyalgia because the doctors could find no explanation but they were wrong. All the symptoms that you shared including that it came on during pregnancy are common
      Lyme disease Symptoms. I will be praying for wisdom what are you in your journey and that God will put you on the past healing.

  36. mommy23boyz says

    I am the mother of 9 yr old triplet boys. I also teach preschoolers with disabilities. My husband started long distance truck driving in Sept, so he is home for a couple of days every few weeks. I am just exhausted. I end up getting 3-4 hours sleep per night. I am just tired. I know I cannot be my best with so little sleep, but I just can’t settle my mind enough to sleep. I am having surgery next week on my foot and will have to be at rest for a week or so. I am actually looking forward to being able to sleep all night and not feel guilty about what isn’t getting done. Thank you for your blog and your willingness to pray for us!

  37. Katy Blevins says

    Please pray for me. I am Mom to twin 2.5 year old boys and a 13 year old daughter. I am at a crossroads in my life and in my marriage and I’m praying for guidance, healing, clarity and that we can move together towards a better future and life, but it feels overwhelming and impossible most days. And the pressure that comes from coping with all of that, along with parenting twins and a teenager…I’ve got very little left and am desperately clinging to Jesus.

  38. Kristen says

    Prayers appreciated for my beautiful daughter who suffers from several brain disorders. Life is such a puzzle for her. And at times, for me as well. Why do other children, and their parents, need to be so cruel and uncompassionate? No playdates or birthday party invites. They ignore her and tease her in school. And why isn’t the school district doing more to invest in her success? She gets by, but if they would only acknowledge that she learns differently, and make the proper accommodations and modifications with her work, she would soar! Prayers for strength, patience, guidance, stronger faith,and good friends for both my daughter and Me! Thank you.

  39. Kara says

    Dear Ruth, Your post is very inspiring and lifted my spirit. It encouraged me to rest in God’s goodness. I am a single mom and I am working alone to raise my two daughters. I pray that God would send me a helper but I feel like He is more strengthening me in His arms. I do not understand, but I am placing my trust and hope in Him who knows my weaknesses and pain too well more than I do. Please pray for me and my daughters-Sophia and Sabryna. I pray that my girls will grow up in beauty, wisdom, and Fear of the Lord. I pray that God will keep us healthy and give me wisdom and strength as I face all the responsibilities. I am confident that I am not alone, God will always provide. Thank you for prayers. God bless you and your beautiful family. Kind Regards, Kara

  40. amber1979 says

    This article was a breath of fresh air for me! I’m a mama to three beautiful young children who lives with a chronic illness that keeps me for the last two years being unable to care for them full time without help and I miss a lot of their lives. Despite that I still feel like I can’t can’t keep up with the fraction of things that is set before me. There’s so many things I long to be able to do with them but my illness keeps me from being able to sit for any length of time or be on my feet for too long so it definitely makes you need challenges as a part-time homeschool which the Lord has called. Could you please pray for healing, wisdom about how to order my days to make the most of every day & he Lord to prosper our family. Thank you

    • M&M says

      I am in tears because i understand exactly how you feel! You will be in my daily prayers Hun! In our trials the purpose will be eventually revealed.

      • amber1979 says

        Thank you so much for the prayers! They are so very appreciated! You too will be in my daily prayers. I love what you said about the purposes one day being revealed… I see God’s hand working so much when I focus on giving thanks & choosing joy rather then letting the darkness overwhelm.

  41. angelsa0626 says

    OKay, so why do I feel like I need to jump through hoops, to become an Oscar-caliber actress, just to be a mother and wife. I have ceased to exist as an individual, to be in these roles that I never even wanted for myself when I was young. I found the Lord and took up the righteous path that I thought was expected of me. I got married and popped out 4 kids. Now I am trapped, alone and unfulfilled. There is nothing that I do that gives me any sense of accomplishment or joy. I let my husband into my struggle and he basically got offended and wondered how I could not be content with all that we have. Now I feel like I’d better step up the acting to make him feel like everything is wonderful so he doesn’t feel bad. It may sound selfish, but when do I get a little focus or attention. Everything in my life is for my husband, my kids, or our home. Why does it seem that this life basically condemns me to wanting something for myself?! Where is the joy, love, and relationship that I was promised? This is all work and worry! I have 3 daughters and honestly, I don’t know how I’m going to encourage them to get married and have children when I know what kind of future it will mean for them!

  42. Jos @ Joyful{in}Chaos says

    Thank you for this timely blog. I only have 2, but I doubt that really makes it any better or worse. I am a p/t working / stay at home homeschooling momma, and between that and then just…all the house and wifely duties…I have started to feel like balance isn’t attainable. Maybe it’s not. And maybe that’s okay. What I do try to do each day, though, with God’s grace … is enjoy my kids…dirty dishes or not, I TRY to play and giggle and read and sing and laugh and watch silly youtube videos. I want them to remember THAT not all the work/clean house/clean dishes. But thank you for helping me to realize I am not alone in this journey…it does often feel so lonely.

  43. Elizabeth says

    Thank you for posting this! I am 32 and have two darling sons, 4 and 20 months. I’ve been going trough a tough time trying to balance caring for all that needs to get done and spending joyful quality time with them. I feel like I’m so serious most times and in a training and correcting mode that gets exausting. And the day goes rather quick. Preparing meals, cleaning up, play time, pre school time (don’t have a regular routine yet), then nap time and then dinner prep and cooking and cleaning and it seems I’m spent :-( but I’m so thankful our worth is found in Christ. The Lord gives us strength, joy, purpose, all that we need for life and godliness. I just pray I see more of Him and less of me and figure these things out sooner than later :-)

  44. Regina Tuttle says

    I tell God every night I am giving him my worries and putting it in His hands but then I wake up and it starts..the worry of my senior student getting to school on time or she wont graduate..the worry of my other senior high student being pregnant, getting enough rest and so on. The worry of my grown boys with their own families and my grandchildren being ok day to day in this hard to make a living life. I worry about my husand who works from sun up til sun down trying to make a nice life for all of us. I worry about my dying dad and my sickly mom. I take care of them all while working as much as I can for Hospice. I am drained, exhausted, hopeless that all this worry will never end until I die. I pray I really pray and then I feel calm and then it starts all over. I am drowning and as much as I try to tell my caring husband how I feel he dont get it. He doesnt see why I worry about the kids or bills. He listens and tries but dont get it. I want to go to sleep one night and really have a restful sleep and wake up and not have the worry.

  45. Lauren says

    I appreciated this reminder as a new mom of a four month old baby! I need to relinquish the to-do list and enter into a grace-filled journey of being led by the Spirit to walk in God’s priorities for my day!

  46. Ann Trotter McCarville says

    Like you, I am past the rocking babies and chasing toddlers phase. Right now (my youngest is almost 5) my biggest challenge is my 3 boys (9-13) fighting almost constantly. I’m so weary of it! So since you asked, I’d love for you to pray for me! :-)
    For wisdom, patience, and love….

  47. MaireeDee Pantzer says

    Thank you for your post, Ruth. I’m a mom of three little ones, ages 4 and under. My littlest treasure joined us a week ago! Three little people is a huge blessing and (at the moment) quite an overwhelming job. Worries (about breast feeding, sickness, finances, having enough love to give for all three, and behavioral outbursts from my firstborn) are taking over space in my brain and causing me to lose sleep. I also wish I could connect with God more in this season. I would love to have your prayers for wisdom, energy, and grace. Thanks again, and thanks for your blog; I always appreciate it!

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