How to Really Begin Your Life As A Mom


leaves photo

This morning I found myself curled up in the candlelight with my children, reading one of my favorite devotionals, Thoughts to Make Your Heart Sing. In the throws of Fall foliage outside, we found ourselves drawn to a page full of red leaves and began reading about how in the Autumn, when chlorophyll depletes and the cold chill wisps through the air, leaves reveal their true colors. Each leaf slowly and beautifully shows us what they are really made of- and it only comes as they lose their life.

In Autumn, we see the dying, and in that, the beauty that has been hidden all along is revealed to us is golden and ruby hues of glory.

We are like leaves, mamas. Our beauty shines brightest when we reach the end of ourselves.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:9

I am weak. I can feel it in my bones at the end of the day, I can sense it in my nod over dinner time conversation- a nod is so much easier to produce than a full sentence at certain times of the night.

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 5:3

I long for the kingdom of heaven to be tangible in my home, in my heart. . . in my mothering. On my own, I lack in my offering of grace, of kindness, of patience and self control and diligence. My offerings are meager. I reach the end of what I have to give every day and in that place, I meet my greatest of hope.

When we reach our own end, we are greeting our true beginning.

My real life as a mom begins at the end of myself. When I depend, rely and face my desperate need for Christ.  My mothering really begins when it is hidden in Him. When I am hidden in Him.

When you reach the end of yourself, when you go weak in the knees with exhaustion, when you feel buried under the rhythm of the dishes, the laundry, the carpool, the frailty of your own heart? Mama, you are in the safest place of all. You are dwelling in the place of surrender. The brilliant hues in you? They are ready to shine beautiful.

Christ in you, Your life hidden in Him- this is the real beginning ready to bring glory into your everyday.

What areas are you surrendering into his hands today, friends?

Praying for you as you seek Him,


Kristen Kill

Kristen Kill is a woman transformed by the delight of God. She loves coffee, gingerbread, and staying up late with her nose in a good mystery. She believes there is something sacred in lighting candles, in setting a beautiful table and inviting others in. Most days she can be found attempting to learn how to cook, redecorating any given room instead of cleaning her house, and homeschooling her five hilarious children. 

A contributing Editor at The Better Mom, and co-host of At Home, a popular podcast with Sally Clarkson, Kristen is passionate about encouraging women who feel stretched thin. She believes that tension is where we can learn to live expectant for the music and melody God is singing over of each one of us. She writes about home, creativity, and flourishing at her blog Hope With Feathers (

After spending the last seven years in the hustle of New York City, she and her husband, Josh, are learning to go slow as they raise their family and walk their anxious hound dog in the Pacific Northwest. Her first book, Finding Selah is due from Zondervan in 2018.

Share this post: