Do they have to save the drama for the mama?

Comment

The minute I walk in the room, the drama begins. The littlest one falls into her weepy, whiny pout posture. The tween huffs and sighs. The teen clamors for my attention with a story that she needs to share. Right now! The little boy tackles my leg with a plea.

 Screen Shot 2013-04-10 at 1.21.05 PM

Why is it that our children feel compelled to save the drama for the momma?


Seriously!  I know I am not alone in this plight. Ahem. Our children have the ability to be pleasant, delightful, and easy going one minute, and the next...well they become a drama-filled mess.

For years, this morph-into-a-mess reality was the source of GREAT irritation. I felt like I was the problem in the equation. Of course, it didn’t help that the grandparents pointed out how, “They were just fine until you came home!” 

Often, I’d sigh hopeless, praying that they would grow up fast and the drama would remain in the past. But as my toddlers became teens, I discovered that our kids don’t grow out of their drama. {Mind you, I should have known this point, having been a mentor of teens for the last 16 years!} No matter the age, we all have the tendency to save our drama for our mamas.  As I came to embrace this truth, the Lord gave me the ability to see {and respond} to the drama in a whole new way.

Three Reasons Why They Save the Drama for the Mama

1. Our Security


There’s nothing like the security found in a momma’s arms, right? Even though we are imperfect (and sometimes the cause of our children’s pain as we fail in our own flesh), mommas represent a home base of safety for a child’s emotional and physical health. While our kids (especially teens) feel the need to be strong for everyone else, in the comfort of their momma’s presence is the one place they can be needy, regardless of their age.

2. Our Sensitivity


A momma’s intuition offers a sensitive response in meeting a child’s emotional and physical needs, faster than anyone else. Even if we, as moms, feel clueless, there is this thing inside of us that will motivate us to discover what our children need.  We notice their every move, their tender hearts, the glossiness in their eyes when a fever hits. We know our children, sometimes better than they know themselves. Of course they melt-down with us, because they know we know best how to meet their needs.

3. Our Strength


We may not feel strong, but for our children, we are a picture of strength. We’ve band-aided their boo-boos, fed their hungry tummies, and washed and bathed their little bodies. Our actions communicate provision. Our ongoing service demonstrates strength and resolve. So why wouldn’t our kids clamor for our attention when they feel a weak, fearful, or simply unable to face today?

Security, sensitivity, and strength.

These are gifts we bestow on our children, even if we are not aware that we’re pouring forth such blessings.

I wonder if the drama our kids save for us is simply the working of God to remind us of the high and holy calling of motherhood? {click to tweet}

When we serve our kids through offering them security, sensitivity, and strength -- in spite of their sometimes unnecessary drama -- we are meeting a God-ordained need designed especially for us to fill. In doing so, we are living out the call to be like Christ to those we’ve been appointed to care for most of all. I thank him... So, momma, will you respond to the drama your kiddos save just for you as an opportunity to overflow the love of Christ on their lives?

1 Timothy 1:12, 14 ESV I thank him who has given me strength, Christ Jesus our Lord, because he judged me faithful, appointing me to his service...and the grace of our Lord overflowed for me with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus.

Elisa Pulliam

Elisa Pulliam is passionate about women experiencing a life transformed by God for the sake of impacting the next generation – a mission fueled by God’s redeeming work in her life and twenty-plus years in youth and women’s ministry. She’s the author of "Meet the New You: A 21 Day Plan for Embracing Fresh Attitudes and Focused Habits for Real Life Change," which is a book designed to help women embrace a fresh encounter with God, and "Impact Together: Biblical Mentoring Simplified." She is also founder of moretobe.com and tremendously enjoys working as a life coach and coach trainer. She considers her greatest roles as wife to Stephen and mom to four amazing children. Connect with Elisa at elisapulliam.com.

Share this post: