Parenting

Did you teach them?

May 23, 2013 By Elisa

I suppose it is normal to have a sobering sense of time when you look up from your desk, caught off guard by the young woman walking through the door, only to realize it is your own daughter.

When did she grow up?

I feel like I just tucked the 4T dresses away for her little sister. Wasn’t it only yesterday when she insisted on wearing sports shorts and a t-shirt, all-the-time? Now she’s dressed like she’s ready to step into the world of business movers and shakers. That’s what dress code looks like on a nearly fully matured teenager’s body.

In only a blink, I am sure she’ll be walking back out that door and into the world God is waiting for her to explore. And I am left to wonder.

Did I teach her the most important lessons of all?

Did I model authentic faith? Did I share with her the awesomeness of God and proclaim His glory in my worship, praise, and prayers? Did I show her what to do with unbelief, letting her know it is okay to cry out to God in doubt but walk faithfully anyways? Have I given her a taste of my whole faith, even the messy parts, because isn’t life messy? Won’t she be a doubting Thomas at times, too? But it is my prayer for her to echo Mary’s words more often, “My soul glorifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior…” (Luke 1:46-47).

In the very blink frozen by my thoughts, I turn my heart to the Lord and stare down Proverbs 3:5-6. It was the very first verse my daughter had to memorize when she entered kindergarten and the very first verse I really sunk my knees deep into prayer over the life of my children.

Oh Lord, may they trust in you with all their heart, and lean not on their own understanding. In all their ways may they submit to you, O God, and may You make their paths straight.

It’s been a prayer for my littles, spoken so many times in gasps of, “Oh Lord. Help them to submit. Dear God, make them stay the straight way.” But in this moment of window gazing and wonderment of time, the Lord whispered to me a new way to use this passage of Truth. He asked me…

Did you teach them to trust me?
Did you teach them how to give their heart to me?
Did you teach them to not lean on their own understanding?
Did you teach them to live set apart?
Did you teach them to pay attention to me?
Did you teach them to follow my ways?
Did you teach them how to live on the straight path?

Did I teach them?

It’s now my accountability checklist for the remainder of my motherhood journey. Not so that I’d feel bound up in condemnation, but so that I’d really pour into the years left with her and her siblings. It’s a tool to help me evaluate my time, offering the Holy Spirit a good old fashion moment of silence as I step away from the screens to face my Maker.

Oh sure, it makes me squirm on days when the answer is “No, Lord. I didn’t.” But because of His grace and the mercies bestowed each morning, I can embrace living with an momma heart, eternally bent. It’s the best thing I can do for my children — to give them Jesus in a faith that’s still being learned — while they are still young enough to teach.

:: click here to download a copy of Did You Teach Them to encourage you
and a printable version of Proverbs 3:5-6 ::

Blessings,

Elisa, MoreToBe.com

10 Comments | Filed Under: Boys, Girls, Parenting, Special Needs, Teens, Toddlers, Uncategorized Tagged With: Elisa Pulliam, motherhood, Proverbs 3:5-6, Teaching

Rediscovering Joy in Motherhood

May 22, 2013 By Brandy Ferguson

By Contributing Writer, Brandy Ferguson

If you read the title of this post and secretly sighed to yourself wishing that you could see the joy again in motherhood, then you’re supposed to be here today.

If you feel you’ve lost the joy you once knew as a young, vibrant mother whose days were filled with new, exciting exploration getting to know your little ones, you’re not alone.

At some point, maybe you’ve felt like you’ve entered a season of just trying to endure, just trying to cover the basics, let alone find joy in the chaos. Is that you? Have you heard yourself whisper to God lately to help you see the beauty? To restore joy unto you?

If you’re like me, many days you feel swept away by the current of your busy family with many little ones at home, and maybe teenagers who need shuttling to this and that. Maybe you feel like you’re so busy moving robotically from one activity to another, managing your task list, that there’s little time for emotion beyond your own emptiness.

Mothers pour themselves out for their families. And we’re supposed to. It’s the way God wired us. We want to nurture our babies and husbands and teach our children and keep our homes. We’re nesters, and it’s in our design.

But that doesn’t mean we don’t get overwhelmed when there’s just too much on the to-do list, day after day. It doesn’t mean we don’t grow weary when we haven’t slept through the night for four years straight.

We don’t always focus on the joy in motherhood, because frankly, so often we’re too busy and too overwhelmed to even remember that this is a blessing.

Sound familiar? If so, your question is the same as mine: How do we rediscover joy in motherhood?

Of course there’s no magic solution, but I’ve learned that it’s a conscious decision involving a few key things.

We must slow down.

Choose to live today. This day. One day at a time.

We must say no to a long list of unnecessary commitments, social and otherwise.

And realize the beauty of teaching our children and keeping our home. Oh, there’s so much more value in our noble work than we can even comprehend.

We must pray and ask God to restore joy to our hearts.

He wants to. He wants to help us embrace the fruits of the Spirit and choose for those to thrive in us. Joy is a choice. We must desire it and decide on it.

We must remember that the joy of the Lord is our strength.

We must stop thinking that we can only have joy if our situation is good or if our circumstances change for the better. Joy is knowing that no matter what, our salvation, and our existence in Eternity is with Him.

We must trust that joy does come in the morning.

Whatever we’re going through, we must remember that He has a plan. He has it all figured out, and did, long before we were born. So often, if we’ll just hold on, circumstances do change, and relief comes with a new day. And we can trust that ultimately, even if we can’t understand the why’s and how’s of our temporary positions here on this earth, true joy will be realized when we see our Creator face to face in Eternity.

Image Credit

8 Comments | Filed Under: Discipling Children, Following God, Parenting, Uncategorized

The Growly Books: A Journey for the Whole Family {Giveaway}

May 22, 2013 By guest

holding-book

The excitement in our home has been almost palpable the last few days. For months now, we’ve been working hard on a book. A children’s chapter book that is the tangible result of years of dreaming.

Something about the process has brought special joy to Phil and I. It’s the fact that our girls have been included in the journey. They have not written the book, designed it, or done any of the actual work. Yet they have been by our sides throughout the process.

They’ve known that Daddy was getting up before dawn morning after morning to write. They peered over my shoulder as I did the first edits. We asked for their feedback when we named the characters, chose the color of the title on the cover, and more.

Why does this matter? Because when we include our children, the journey becomes richer, stronger, and more meaningful. I know that our girls will look back with fond memories of this process. Because it wasn’t something that Daddy and Mommy did on their own. It was a project they felt included in.

As the first reviews for the book have come in, Phil and I have been so blessed to see that the same sense of togetherness is present when families read the book. Review after review carries the same theme, family time spent reading together:

“Whether it’s books for me, or for my children, I’m always on the look out for either. The best books are sometimes, the ones that are for all of us. Begin (the first of The Growly Books) is such a book.” – Kris Camealy

“The very first night I started this book with the boys, it received the highest compliment it can get from them: ‘Keep reading, Mommy! And that went on chapter after chapter until we had read for much longer than any of us had planned!” – Erin Mohring

“My daughter and I started reading this together before bed the other night and she instantly talked me into reading ‘just one more chapter!’ After about 3 or 4 chapters with her, I picked it up and read it straight through for myself!” – Amanda White

Our hope was that this book would be something families could enjoy reading together. And it brings us special joy to see that becoming a reality.

About the Book

“For centuries the bears of Haven have lived quiet lives, high in the mountains at the edge of the great Precipice. That all changes for a young cub named Growly when he receives a mysterious message. With just his backpack and glider, Growly sets out on a desperate journey to find his grandfather’s long lost friend . . . and to find a way back home. Begin is the first book in The Growly Books series. Written for the 8-12 year old reading level, it is also a captivating read aloud for younger children and will appeal to anyone who appreciates stories of adventure and friendship. The book contains 35 chapters, with 13 beautiful illustrations by Annie of Be Small Studios.”

The book is available now in both paperback and Kindle formats!

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A Giveaway: Annie Barnett (Be Small Studios) is graciously offering a giveaway of an 8×10 print of an original pencil and hand-painted watercolor version of one of The Growly Books: Begin’s illustrations. The image is printed on high-quality cold press matte paper, to replicate the feel and look of the original watercolor.

To enter join the Rafflecopter below:
a Rafflecopter giveaway

Erin crop (Darcy)

Erin’s heart for helping others achieve their goals is the foundation of her successful business, Design by Insight. Using her ability to ask the right questions, Erin captures the message of a project and translates that into a great design. Erin and her husband Phil have established a reputation for quality design, professional client relationships, and personal commitment to each project. Her book, Self Publish: Moving from Idea to Product (co-authored with Teri Lynne Underwood), gives writers the tools they need to effectively plan their own self-published projects. Erin and Phil’s first children’s chapter book, The Growly Books: Begin released in May 2013. You can also find Erin writing at her personal blog, ErinUlrich.com.

Erin lives in South Carolina with her husband Phil and their two daughters, and their home is usually a whirlwind of creative activity.

24 Comments | Filed Under: Fun For Kids, Homeschooling, Parenting, Uncategorized

15 Things Moms Wish They Knew Before Having Children

May 19, 2013 By Ashley Schnarr

Photo Credit

Are you a mom to be or young woman who would like to have children one day?

I asked a group of ladies what things they wished they knew or had taken the time to learn before having children. They gave a lot of good responses and I found the information helpful as I, a young single woman, prepare for my future family.

I have paraphrased some of the responses below:

1.) I wish I knew that life would change drastically, constant interruptions and down-right difficult time but it’s worth every minute of it.

2.) I wish I had been a better steward of my finances and thought more carefully about student loans so I didn’t have to worry so much about money issues when children came along.

3.) I wish I had guarded my heart and body better and asked myself, “How will this choice affect me 20 years down the road? How will it affect my future children?”

4.) I wish I had learned to cook and prepare healthy food for my family before I was married with children so they didn’t have to be the ginny pigs.

5.) I wish I knew that having children is way more about sanctification and sacrifice than luxury.

6.) I wish I had learned to trust and rely on God more. Some days are challenging and the future is uncertain.

7.) I wish I had learned to make a routine for my devotions. It’s so much harder to find time or be awake and alert enough when you have little ones.

8.) I wish I had been more diligent about saving money.

9.) I wish I had learned to be a better time manager.

10.) I wish I understood that life will get crazy and you can’t always get everything done.

11.) I wish I knew that “me” time would be limited and that I had realized earlier that Jesus bought us with his blood so all of our time should really be HIS time.

12.) I wish I had spent more time around other children so I knew better what to expect and how to raise with my own.

13.) I wish I had thought about what I believe about raising children and then made sure my husband and I were on the same page.

14.) I wish I had learned how to be a godly wife for my husband because that also effects your children and parenting.

15.) I wish I had known how important it was to have a support group you could rely on for friendship and practical encouragement.

Just one little note: We can never be completely prepared for the joy of marriage or children and God can use even the most unprepared women but it is still wise to take time to learn and grow so we can be good examples of motherhood for His glory!

Blessings,

Ashley
www.stayathomedaughter.com