Over the ‘Princess’ Message


I am so over the “God’s princess” message. I (despite my love for pink things) have no desire to wear the dress, be in the tower, and wait for someone to rescue me. I know I am the daughter of the King, but what if we talked to girls in this next generation about being God’s heroine instead?

During an informal survey I conducted online, I asked women to name who came to mind when they thought “heroine.” There were many entries about mothers and sisters, tales of how we see their sacrifice and consistency. They have substance and grit and willpower, and those of us who have benefitted from those qualities are quick to give this title to those women. I already want to be in that camp.

I also heard names in my survey such as Amelia Earhart and Rosa Parks, Mother Theresa and Joan of Arc. Clara Barton and Esther and Corrie Ten Boom. Harriet Tubman and Elisabeth Elliot—the list goes on and on. What these women have in common are qualities we aspire to possess; they have stood up for who and what they believe in. (And we are taking note.)

When we emphasize being a princess, we risk the implication of greater outer beauty, while a heroine has a notable inner beauty and strength. People tend to admire the princess for her appearance, while a heroine is remembered for her actions.

Being a heroine means living what is, to you, an extraordinary life—not fulfilling someone else’s ideas of who you should be, but by making a life based on what you feel God’s stamped into your soul. My favorite heroines see their every day as an opportunity to connect with a larger world, one hungry to know there is more substance to life than reality television sells us.

This is real to me, as a woman, but even more so when I think about my daughters. I want to spend less time filtering what the world teaches and more time captivating them with a greater truth. I can’t avoid what they will see in the world, those messages they are absorbing through media and peers, but I can purpose to tell them about the grandmothers and the Corrie Ten Booms. I can remark more on their attributes than their cute outfits.

Here’s to a new generation of fairy tales.


Beth Guckenberger, bethguckenberger.com

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  1. Barb Spencer says

    I cannot tell you how much I agree with what you have said here. Thank you so much for sharing a message that is so needed. ~Barb

  2. Katie Shannon says

    At first I wasn’t going to read this, because I love princess things, I love pink & girly-ness, but THIS makes sense!

  3. Dawn Richter says

    There are a couple books out there about being a “Warrior Princess.” I believe that traditional fairy tales that are mentioned do have some valuable lessons to teach us. Especially when it comes to God’s intended roles for marriage. But as a woman, Christian, and human being in general, there is no guarantee that marriage is in the cards for everyone. Thus a young woman should spend many of her formative years preparing herself to be her own rescuer of sorts until such a time that she meets the RIGHT (not just anyone) man. If she has a strong sense of who she is, where she is headed, and how to get there, she will be vastly more likely not to waste her life on a worthless man.

  4. Heather says

    While I understand the point you are trying to make, there are those out there that have been so hurt and abused, they need to know that they are God’s princess, loved and cherished by the King! It’s not about what is on the outside, it’s about the heart.

  5. SimplySaidMom says

    Amen! As a mother raising girls it is important to me to set examples they can look up to, not by being impressed with the “women of this world,” but by being a woman God designed.

  6. Shelly Roy says

    Beth, Thank you SO much for your words! While it is true that we are princesses, as daughters of the King I believe it is important to live every day as a daughter who is true to Gods’ stamp on my heart!

  7. Rita says

    Absolutely Awesome! I struggle so much with the princess image. Now that I have a little girl I so want her to grow up without the outward pressure to fit the princess mold…but I also hope she will embrace her femininity. You have just made sense of something that has been percolating in my soul but was without description. Heroine! Yes.

  8. says

    I don’t understand why being a “Princess” has to have a negative message-like it means you are weak or vain. I believe a princess can be have a strong character as well. I think we should always be a princess to our men. Guess it depends on the mentality you choose to take.

  9. Cristal says

    Yes! There’s very little to admire in the Disney-style princess message that gets pushed on little girls these days (Golden hair. Save me, save me. Kiss me. Happy ever after). And “God’s Princess” is just the same thing with religious overtones. I’m telling my daughter that she can marry the prince after she goes to university.

  10. Sarah says

    Why not reclaim the term as Christians and teach our children the true meaning and implications of being a princess, that is, a child of God and heir of His salvation? I think it is a very apt word and one we shouldn’t let the world have their way with. I say USE IT and teach truth through it.

  11. Shari says

    I am over the whole princess thing, too, but for different reasons. ALL of us think WAY too highly of ourselves. Even people with so-called “low self esteem” are consumed with thoughts of themselves. We need NOT to focus on ourselves but on our Creator!!! Our KING!! Princess focuses on us. Let’s focus on the King of Kings and dump the whole princess line.

  12. Amara says

    I get what your saying… but I also have no issue with “God’s princess” because its not the same as the princesses your talking about. In fact, if one was to study the requirements of royalty and what standards a princess had to (nowadays might be different) live up to, its quite a good example. Weather she was beautiful on the outside or not (not all princesses are beautiful!) she had to have particular moral standards, and be personally involved in charity of some sort. Disney princesses have been a terrible example of a princess, although lately I hear theyve been pumping out some “heroine” type princesses… unfortunately with that comes the whole attitude thing. My daughter doesnt watch the disney movies. I watched them as a child (mum wasnt a Christian) and I absolutely adored each and every one of them… but as I grew up and became an adult I realised a number of flaws with disney princesses. Once, they were all about the “save me save me”, two, alot of them were rebellious (Ariel with her father, my goodness!) 3, they have a dismal idea of what actual love is. sigh. So I agree with you for the most part. But I certainly dont have a problem with teaching my child she is a child of the King or a Princess of the King. Look at princess dianne, she was a great example of a Princess! From my limited knowledge of her anyway.

  13. Becky W. says

    BRAVO-EXCELLENT MESSAGE-FINALLY SOMEONE ELSE IS SPEAKING THIS TRUTH…This is a subject that the Lord has been stirring in my heart for about 5 yrs or so (especially when my 2 sons began to date). They both have dated, yes good christian girls, with what I will call “the princess syndrome” mentality. I did NOT say reality but mentality…big difference!

    Thank you-Thank you-Thank you…

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