Making Family Your Primary Ministry and Better Mom Mondays Link-Up

Welcome to Week #2 of our Say Yes Series!  Were you able to craft a family mission statement last week? I hope so! It is the foundation for pursuing intentionality in our mothering! It will help you set the course for how you want to spend your time.

Today I want to focus on priorities as a mama, specifically as it relates to our ministry. How can we become a YES mom, one that fully engages with her life and her children? I believe it starts with viewing our job as mom as our primary ministry, as our first mission field

I want to ask you: are you filling your life so full that you do not have time to truly invest in your home and family? It may be time for you to take some time with the Lord to evaluate what He has for you and to help you figure out what you need to let go.

As women, we fall for this idea that we can “do it all”, and usually end up frazzled and frustrated.  But when we understand what God wants us to do and ask for His help, it leads to freedom and joy. What motivates your activities? Are you trying to make a good impression? It is just that you can’t say no? Why don’t you ask God what is on His agenda for this season of your life?“- Nancy Leigh DeMoss

This isn’t to say that any ministry outside of your family is wrong, not at all! We just need to be careful about how full we fill our plates, and seek the Lord and what He has for us to do.  There are so many opportunities, but what are the ones only you can do? There are very few things that only you can do….like being a wife to your husband and your children.

Last week, Ruth talked about using the word NO.  It is so important for us moms to be able to say no to the good, so that we can say yes to the best.  Ask any older woman and she will tell you, “It went by so fast. My kids were grown before I knew it.  Cherish the time you have with them.

Deuteronomy 6:7-9 says, “You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up.”

He has entrusted us with little souls that are searching for truth, and our job is to teach them diligently.  This kind of ministry takes time! It is important not to underestimate just how much time it takes to really do this job well. 

[Motherhood as a mission field] is giving up yourself. Lay yourself down. Sacrifice yourself here, now. Cheerfully wipe the nose for the fiftieth time today. Make dinner again for the people who don’t like the green beans. Laugh when your plans are thwarted by a vomiting child. Lay yourself down for the people here with you, the people who annoy you, the people who get in your way, the people who take up so much of your time that you can’t read anymore. Rejoice in them. Sacrifice for them. Gain that which you cannot lose in them.“ Rachel Jankovic

Our first, our primary, our most important ministry, is right in our homes training our little ones.  I know that it isn’t glamorous and there is no one clapping for you at the end of the day.

The late Sono Harris (the mother of Josh Harris and Alex and Brett Harris) said this, “The season of young children is a time to refrain. Refrain from most outside activities, even some church activities. Now is a time to be faithful in discipline…it’s the springtime of mothering. Redeem the time, don’t waste it.” Sono did not know that her life would be cut short due to cancer, that she would leave her family before all of her children were grown. I’m guessing beautiful Sono is looking down from heaven now, happy with her choice to invest in the lives of her family first.

Your assignment this week: Get alone with the Lord, spending some time quietly with Him in His Word. Evaluate your commitments and ask the Lord if there is anything you need to let go.  Take a moment to imagine yourself looking back on your life. What would you want to do differently? What would you regret? What would you want to change? 
We will use this next Monday, so be sure to come back for more discussion on our priorities as a mom!

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About Joy

Joy is the wife to a missionary pilot and they, along with their five kids, live in Indonesia.  Joy is a proud wife, blessed mommy, Diet Coke fanatic, runner, homeschooler, reader, thinker, home-maker, lover of nature, and most of all, an undeserving recipient of amazing grace, and grateful daughter of God.  Joy's heart is to encourage women to revel in their job as mommy and wife, and to see it as good and needed work.  She shares her heart and life of being a mom with readers at her site, Grace Full Mama.

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  • http://www.godcenteredmom.com/ Hmacdaddy

    Thanks Joy for this great reminder! It was Sally Clarkson’s book “Mission of Motherhood” that first made me aware of the thinking that motherhood is my first mission field. It helped not feel guilt when I said no to other ministry opportunities. It gave value to the mundane tasks. Our family tries to think in terms of “good, better, best” & wholeheartedly agree that we can say “yes” to some good things, missing the best things. hope all is well for you across the globe!!

    • Joy

      What a great perspective Heather! I love your “good, better, best” idea. I love Sally’s Mission of Motherhood book too! Have a great day!

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  • Jacqueline @ Deeprootsathome

    Good Morning, Ruth and Joy,
    I pray you are both filled with the wonder of God’s love and care for you and yours today! May you be thankful and blessed :) Joy, I am especially interested to learn more about you as my son is training to be a pilot and just got back from Malaysia and Bali.

    • Joy

      Oh! Jacqueline that is right up my alley! :) Malaysia and Bali are right in the area that I live (sort of!). I’d love to hear more!

  • http://www.deniseinbloom.com Denise In Bloom

    Oh Joy I love this post. I didn’t know about Sono Harris. What a life well lived. I am blessed to read this post and it definitely brings me to my knees.

    Love ya much!

    • Joy

      Yes, about Sono, it was last year. She was an amazing woman. :) Thank you for your kind words and encouragment! :) Glad we are in this together.

  • Kayla

    This totally gave me a bit of a shake this morning- I definitely need to do some reevaluating… Thank you

    • Joy

      Kayla, you are not alone! We all need to constantly be thinking about our priorities and what God has for us. Thanks for sharing! :)

  • http://www.encouragingheartsathome.com Misty Krasawski

    I love you all! This is very wonderful. And true, true, true! Thank you for sharing!

    • http://www.thechuppies.blogspot.com/ Kara @ The Chuppies

      Misty–I’m lovin’ Titus 2…meant to stop by and tell you that…but since you’re over here anyway :)

      • Joy

        Me too!! :)

        • http://www.encouragingheartsathome.com Misty Krasawski

          And you always make me joyful, sweet Joy!

      • http://www.encouragingheartsathome.com Misty Krasawski

        Awww, you don’t know how happy that makes me! (((love)))

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  • http://www.thechuppies.blogspot.com/ Kara @ The Chuppies

    Love this Joy…
    Feels like freedom.
    I’m in Galations right now…
    Am I trying to please men or God?
    Sometimes others won’t understand if we say “no”…
    But if it’s directed by God–
    Then I can rest in that.

    • Joy

      Kara, that has been what I am learning too. Saying no and resting in the fact that I know that I am following the Lord. I have people in my life that do not understand if I need to step back or say no, and at times it is so hard to feel as though I’ve let others down…but that resting in the Lord is so sweet. :)

  • guest

    I really enjoy this website but sometimes feel left out. You see, I am a working mom.

    “Today I want to focus on priorities as a mama, specifically as it relates to our ministry. How can we become a YES mom, one that fully engages with her life and her children? I believe it starts with viewing our job as mom as our primary ministry, as our first mission field. ”

    I truly believe that but then I work 8 or 9 hours a day. Even though I work in my dad’s business, my children have to go to school & daycare. And then some days we go to church or they go to gymnastics. (I limit their extracurricular activities to just one) And then some days I have to go get groceries. And on Saturdays while I’m off, I try to stay on top of the housework. I used to work out 2 or 3 nights a week but because of the mommy guilt I was feeling I stopped.

    It’s hard knowing my children are with others more hours then with me. I figured it out, if we get home at 6:30, We have three hours together before bedtime but that time is spent going over homework, cooking, cleaning, and bath.

    Sometiems it’s frustrating because a lot times I feel as if the Christian communtiy overlooks those of us who do work full time on top of being a mother.

    I guess my question is how can I focus more on my priority as a mother, while working 8 or 9 hours a day. I can’t say no to work.

    Are there other working moms who feel like I do?

    *Trust me I do believe stay at home moms work too but I feel as if it’s totally different from me who works outside of the house away from my girls for 8 or 9 hours a day.

    • Courtney

      Dear guest,

      I think it’s interesting that the one comment on the blog without another comment is the one comment that Google found and drove me to the site.

      I, too, am a working mom, spending 9 hours away from my kids. I hate it, but it’s just where I am at the moment. I’m looking for resources to help me cope with my situation, but I feel like it’s falling flat.

      Is anyone out there doing ministry to working moms? Surely, guest can’t be the only one… What would it look like to reach out unconditionally to women with no time to spare and an extra dose of guilty conscience?

      • anonymous

        I would guess that the reason no one is responding to this, is that we don’t know what advice to give you. I just found this blog, and found it to be helpful, but I also am a SAHM. I would encourage you to seek God and His will in you life. As you do this, and find peace and acceptance in Him, He will lead you, and you will not need to feel guilty. He knows the burden you carry. He loves you, and has forgiven your sins, so that your burden can be a light one. (Matt. 11:28-30) Working outside the home is a burden for a mother. Ideally you could be in your home with your children. I know this is not possible for everyone – we each have things that can prevent that. However, I know it is not an easy burden. God has promised to be with us and not give us more than we can bear! These are precious promises that help us make it through tough times. May you lay your anxieties before Him, and He will give you the peace that passes all understanding! (phil. 4:8&9)

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  • http://farmfaithfamily.blogspot.com/ Jody

    Again Joy, thank you for helping other moms to see the ultimate importance of being a mother, our God-given role He has blessed us with. We think we cannot say no to things, but if we put them in the eternal perspective, our vision begins to clear and we can see what is really important. Yes, there are alot of “good” things we can do, but sometimes we must let the “good” go for the “best.”
    Blessings to your family!
    Always Experiencing Him,
    Jody

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