You Can’t Give What You Don’t Have

We’ve all seen it before. Women go into motherhood and as all mothers they have high hopes of raising godly, well-behaved children. They want their children to be loving, kind, patient, joyful, selfless but instead their children become quite the opposite.

Nursery workers groan when they catch a glimpse of them. Babysitters suddenly make plans when they see their phone number on the Caller ID. And everyone else runs to the nearest exit at the sight of them; while the mother, impatiently screaming at her kids to obey, doesn’t understand why she can’t get her children under control.

We’ve all watched this scene before and maybe you, along with the desperate mother, are asking “What went wrong?!”.  Maybe this scene described is your life.  There is hope.

I can’t speak for every situation, but if the scenario described above is a common occurrence it can best be summed up in one simple sentence: You Can’t Give What You Don’t Have.

If you want your children to be loving, kind, patient, joyful and selfless you must be those things first. Rarely does the “do-as-I-say-not-as-I-do” plan work out very well. Children are great imitators and most of the time your attitude, the words you say and the tone of voice you use will be mirrored. If you are impatient, they will be too. If you scream and yell, so will they. If you are disrespectful, there is a good chance they will also be disrespectful.

It is the duty of a parent to model the character of Christ not only because this is a command for our own lives but also because others (in this case children) are watching. Often times we don’t realize the extent and impact of our influence but it is very powerful and it does effect the people around us, either for good or evil. (check out my series on the Power of a Woman’s Influence).

But having a Christ-like character doesn’t happen over night. It is a life long process and something that must be cultivated. I believe we should strive towards being loving, kind, patient, joyful, selfless long before we have children, long before we are married. We should work on these things NOW. TODAY. Not only so we will glorify Christ in the stage we are at, but also thinking ahead to when we have children of our own. It will be much easier to instill Godly character into our children later on, if we own these traits for ourselves now.

“You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your sons…” -Deuteronomy 6:5-7

Photo Credit: M Glasgow

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